In slightly more than a week, I will be in California walking for Relay For Life. I know everyone has causes they like to support, but I would appreciate it if you visited my Relay For Life page, and let others know about this walk in memory of my sister, Laurianne. All donations are appreciated.
I read blogs about people who have great relationships with their siblings, or their siblings drive them batty at every turn. Some of you have problems with your siblings, however big or small. Some of you have children, who hopefully will grow up together to become good people, whether they drive each other crazy or not. But imagine if that was all taken away. How petty would the arguments be if your sibling wasn’t there anymore. Or if you suddenly lost one of your children. Because, that’s what happened to my family.
Laurianne as a baby
When my sister was born, I hated her. Maybe hate is too strong of a word, but imagine this little bundle of noise coming into your home after your mom leaves a few days, and she gets all the attention. Not to mention, only two short years ago, they brought home something called a brother. The brother wasn’t too bad, he had brown eyes too. But this kid, she had “the most beautiful blue eyes”. Seriously, I couldn’t get away from hearing about it. Strangers would stop my mom and tell her about her baby’s beautiful blue eyes, and I would cry, “But what about my eyes!” And my mom would say, “You have beautiful brown eyes too!” Then her hair started to grow in. And the compliments started to get worse.
Laurianne on the Beach
“Oh my goodness, look at that hair!” Yes, while my brother and I had brown eyes, and blondish-brown hair, my sister somehow became the chosen one with blue eyes and platinum blonde hair. My brother and I would not stop hearing about it.
But this started to work in my favor. When my school had a candy bar drive, my mom took my two year old sister around the neighborhood to help me sell candy bars. And my sister couldn’t get the price right. They were a dollar. She would ask people if they would like to buy a candy bar for $2. But she was so cute, most of the time the ladies who answered the door would say, “Oh, just give me a second candy bar.” Later on, as we were growing up, she became my chief sales person for girls scout cookies. And because her big sister was a girl scout, she decided to join a troop as well. And, dare I say it, was she actually starting to be fun to be around?
The Three of Us
Sure we had our difference. There was her New Kids on the Block phase. I still remember songs because of how loud she would play it. There were times I would babysit for my brother and sister, and they would almost seem to gang up on me. But we had good times too. I remember Laurianne and I going for makeovers at The Emporium, a now defunct department store, and then rushing home to take pictures of each other. She had a green dress that she loved to wear.
Fun Times
When she was 18 or 19, she decided to become a nanny. She had always wanted to live in New Jersey, and New York was fine for her too, so she moved in with a couple who had a young child. Later, they had a baby so Laurianne was nanny for two young kids. She enjoyed her time, and loved the kids. She moved back to California for a while, and then to New York again where she worked for the same family until she struck out on her own. Because Dan and I lived closer to her in Indiana, she asked if she could visit us for Thanksgiving. The first year she did this, I remember going up to Nappenee to see Amish communities. We did some internet research and found a group called The Electric Amish which had various songs on their website that we laughed over. I could make her giggle every time just by saying, “Like a mule eating a carrot!,” a line from one of the song.
Nappenee
I remember the second Thanksgiving. She said she didn’t want to visit because she wanted to see the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. Laurianne was very good about achieving her goals, whether it be graduating high school early or going to Holland, and so there was no talking her out of it. I talked with her later that night, and she didn’t really enjoy herself. I remember her exclaim, “I went to five McDonald’s and not one of them was open!” She decided to visit us again next year. And the next year, she told me she was pregnant.
If you know the history, you would know Laurianne’s pregnancy wasn’t an easy one. Doctor’s couldn’t really figure out why. Then Calem was born and three days after that, Laurianne found out she had cancer. I still think it is an injustice, that she had to pour all her love for her baby into four and a half short months. Some days, she would just be too tired, especially towards the end of her treatment. She and I would chat on the phone and she told me how she planned to walk in Relay for Life. That year, I couldn’t make it, so she said to me, “Don’t worry, Lynda. We will plan for you to be out here next year, and you can walk with me then.”
Laurianne at Relay For Life
But she wasn’t there physically, the next year. I wore the pink hat she is wearing in this picture, and carried her son around the track during the opening ceremony dedicated to her, and I knew she was still there with me in spirit, walking with me.
But mostly, I will never forget when Dan and I flew out to California to visit and see Calem for the first time. Laurianne and I decided to go for a walk around the block, a major feat for someone who only had 2% lung capacity in one lung. As we were walking around the block, two ladies as old as our grandmother drove up in an older vehicle. They call out, “Excuse me, do you know where the Merlot Gardens are?” Laurianne told me to stay with Calem, and she walked over and pointed them in the right direction. The lady in the passenger seat said, “Thank you, dear.” Then she kind of did a gasp and said, “You have the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen.” Laurianne said thank you. And as we started walking again, she pats me on the arm and says, “Don’t worry, Lynda. You have beautiful brown eyes too.”
(She was the first to day happy birthday.)
